its march the 13th today. and holidays are almost over. boo hoo hoo...

it wasnt a bad and boring week. but it wasnt as fun as i anticipated it to be. my hair "dropped" on monday. i am determined to keep my hair long from now on. i just dont see what's so fantastic about short hair.. i wanna long hair! opinions were fired at me when i went out this week, some reckon i look better, others voiced out that its too short. i guess what's done cannot be undone. and i am NOT going to cry over spilled milk. actually it doesnt really bother me, short or long, but other ppl's opinion does. whenever ppl say stuff that i dont expect to hear, i would dwell on it, even up to numerous days. i'm always sooo in my mind, seldom in my spirit. pondering seems to be what i do best. hah! now i sound like some no-confidence kid. oh shut up!

tuesday was one longg day. started out as usual with jogging. then there was class outing that i seriously looked forward to. but of cos high expectations comes great disappointments. only a measly 10 ppl turned up. less than half the class. what's wrong with everybody?? is slping so important that they have to give tis class outing a miss? haiz... oh well. i'm in no position to judge anyway. on the other hand,.smaller groups are easier to mix around. got to strike a conversation here and there... so far so good. no major awkardness. its not that bad. but could be better with more ppl around(: i ended the day with swensens and prayer mtg.
on top of these ups and downs on tues, i went around with a sinking feeling. i told myself i had to go for prayer mtg AND i must persuade the others to go too. i sure felt lousy when i didnt succeed. i really dont noe why its so difficult to attend just this one and only prayer mtg probably for the next few months. or maybe i just don have those persuading powers. 'Lord, i really cant do this anymore. i have failed You again.' sometimes i wonder, what would it be like if each and every one of the youth are strong in spirit. just five would do. then the whole meeting and everything we do would be different. the whole week just calling and encouraging one another to be in their spirit and to love the Lord. how sweet would that be!!! i pray that one day, the youth gombak district would experience such a revival..